Brother Ron Barnes
Founder and Pastor
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Dear Brother Ron
I want to know what your standards are for keeping your integrity of being a man of God? How do you keep your walk with him and not compromise your integrity? And how do you go about finding a wife? The Bible says he who finds a wife finds a good thing. So what do you look for in a woman?
Dear Heaven Bound
It's a matter of priorities. What is important to you. Matthew 6:21 tells us "For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also". What do you treasure? Do you value service to our Father more than the approval of other humans? Do you treasure your image of yourself as a valuable servant of our Father or do you just do whatever will serve your immediate needs?
The followers of Jesus were known as disciples. This comes from the same source as the word discipline. Contrary to popular belief, discipline has nothing to do with punishment. Discipline just means doing it the same way every time. You mentioned integrity. The dictionary defines integrity as "the state of being whole, entire, or undiminished". Anything which compromises your integrity diminishes you.
So in the end, it comes down to your self-image. If you see yourself as a valuable person and a loyal servant of our Father, you will act like one. You will do this 24 hours a day, seven days a week, not just when you think somebody is watching you. And you would be surprised how often others are watching you, even when you do not realize it.
As a minister, I realize that I am constantly being scrutinized by others. Some are eager to find fault so they can scream "hypocrite" as an excuse for their unbelief. It would be a disservice to our Father for me to give them such an excuse. The same is true for you.
What did I look for in a wife? I looked for a woman who could walk through
life by my side. I didn't want somebody to walk on and I didn't want
somebody I would have to carry. I also wanted somebody who would compliment
me. By that, I mean somebody who would be strong where I was weak and would
use my strengths to overcome her weaknesses.
Fortunately, we found each other.
I have been married for 25 years to a wonderful woman who treats me much better than I deserve. Making her happy makes me happy. If you ever find somebody who has the same effect on you, exercising the discipline needed to sustain a relationship will be a pleasure, not a burden.
Hope this helps.